Ibu, jawablah pertanyaanku wahai ibu..........

(Picture source : www.harrycutting.com) 

Bu, adik Cuma ingin bertanya Rasanya ibu tak akan mampu menjawabnya... 

Ibu ingat 14 feb tak
Malam tu ibu ada janji temu
Ibu jumpa jejaka tu
Ibu kata dia cintakan ibu

Benarkah bu?

Dia puji dan puja ibu
Dia rayu dan belai ibu
Katanya cintanya hanya untuk ibu

Benarkah bu?

Ibu terkhayal dengan bujukannya
Ibu terbuai dalam bicaranya
Ibu terlena oleh bisikannya

Benarkah bu?

Ibu tak kisah dia peluk ibu
Ibu izin dia sentuh jasad ibu
Ibu puas dapat buktikan setia ibu
Macam dia kata.. mahu bukti cinta dari ibu

Tapi benarkah bu?

Masa berlalu,
Hari ini lepas 9 bulan...
Pohon yang ibu dan lelaki tu tanam telah membuahkan hasil
Hari ini buah cinta kalian telah terzahir
Hari ini bukti kasih jejaka itu pada ibu telah lahir...

tapi benarkah bu?

Kenapa dia tidak sama menyambut kami?
Kemana dia telah pergi tidak azankan kami?
Mengapa ibu pun benci kami?
Sedangkan inilah semaian tanda cinta kalian?

Mengapa ibu? 

Tak terasakah sakit dan perit
tak berbakikah kasih dan sayang dan
Tidak lagi kah ibu berTuhan?

Benarkah ibu?
Benarkah begitu? 

adik cuma nak tanya je bu..... 

P/s- kesian anak2 luar nikah....ini lah persoalan yg selalu dorg akan tanya....haizz.....=_="

kumbang dan bunga

Gambar2 yang ak letak nie contoh jer...Credit to tuan punya gambar (maap le en. tuan pnya gambar, saya lupa nk save link)....heee....haaaaaaaaaaaa....back to the story....last nite, my sis and I lepak ler kat pantai seagate...on the way nak p seagate tu, lalu depan queensbay mall, along the way nk p tu, byk nyer kumbang mambang dgn bunger2 yng berdating.....ada gak ler family yg bawak anak2 p bersiar2....heee....then, dekat hujung2 sket.....woooops, ada la 1 couple yg sakan berpeluk ( couple la kot, sbb beria benor berpeluk, kalo dah kawen, xkan nk peluk beria plak kot)......

X_X......Ya Allah, apa la yg depa nie sumer buat.....wahai wanita, betapa murahnyer harga diri kamu....sedangkan agama islam menjunjung tinggi darjat wanita, kenapa la kamu meletakkan harga diri kamu di bawah kaki.....he`s not even ur husband, so please la.....u should know ur limit....haizz...i`m not saying that i` m a "decent" girl, i do hv some "evil" part within myself, tapi to go that far....i will never do that....insyaALLAH....

tp lately, byk jer hal2 mcm nie....bg depa, bnda2 nie something common bila couple, masa nie la nak kenal pasangan kita...hahahaha....hello, kalo nak kenal pon, cukup la kenal bnda yang kita patut tau, yg dalam2 tu pas kawin pon boleh tau....yg nie sebelum kawen dah kena pegang sana sini, nanti dah kawen, nak pegang apa lg? haizzz....

tp lagi memalukan yg buatnyer pompuan melayu and the worst is...depa nie sumer bertudung...sopan je kita tgk org bertudung, manis jer....tapi hakikatnyer tak sumer mcm tu....sebabkan org2 mcm depa nie, perempuan bertudung lain pon kena jugak...."alaaaa, pompuan bertudung bukan sumer baik2..."...memang ler, mna de org yg 100% baik...kalo sumer 100% confirmed baik, xder la mcm2 kes....huhuhuhu.....tp masih la org pandang serong dkt pompuan bertudung.....mcm kwn ak cakap ler, tudung sekarang nie bukan jadi perkara wajib, sebab tudung sekarang dah jadi mcm fesyen....org bertudung sbb fesyen...mcm2 fesyen tudung skrg nie....so, fungsi tudung utk tutup aurat dah xde sebenarnya, lebih kepada fesyen....sbbnyer bertudung, tetap jugak pakai ketat, nampak susuk tubuh.....baik yg ramping mahupun kurang ramping....ketat itu harus.....seksi ler katakan.....huuuuu~

biler dah ketat2 nie, lelaki pon tertarik kan....yer la, lelaki kan memang sejak azali suka bnda2 yg cantik, seksi, yg hot.....hahaha.....lelaki ohhh lelaki......nie pon sorg lg....kalo de kesempatan, xpenah nk lepas peluang.....ak xla kata sumer lelaki mcm tu, ada je lelaki yg betul2 baik, tapi mostly lelaki mmg suka amek kesempatan...maap ler kawan2 lelaki ku, ak tau korg  mmg betul2 baek, wpun ak bukan le pndai menilai org, tpi ak tau mna yg baik n mana yg kureng baik....sendiri tau la kan....heeee~

Hmmm, agak2nyer bila la bnda2 nie boleh hilang....makin lama makin teruk.....sapa yg ptt dipersalahkan....*tut*, *tut* atau *tut* (pihak2 yg berkenaan ler)...malas nk sebut...sendiri mau tau la ekk....hehehe....i wish 1 day ak leh pikirkan cara nk atasi masalah nie....nak atasi tu agak susah (x optimis langsung), tapi akan ak pikirkan cara nk reduce masalah nie....huhuhu...insyaALLAH...so, utk msa skrg ak cuma leh berdoa supaya ALLAH sentiasa lindungi ak, tetapkan iman ak and jauhkan ak dari perkara2 mungkar nie....1 je sebenarnyer, kalo kita x mula, takkan jadi sebenarnyer....kalo dorg isi masa "berpegang" dorg dgn aktiviti yg lain, ada gak faedahnyer...aktiviti apa ekk? huuuu......xde ko aktiviti yg sesuai dgn couple, sbb tu la aktiviti "pegang" jadi pilihan dorg...hiks.... 

Nie 1 lg gambar ak amek kat internet(sekali lg en.tuan punya gambar, maap, sya lupa nak save links, btw, thanks for the pix)....ada ke patut dating kat semak....buatnyer ada ular ke...buta jer mati kena patuk...xsempat nak kawen dah mati...ish3.....

hehehe...Ok la, itu je nak share hari nie.....nnt de yg interesting ak nk share, i will update my blog...jaaa~ ^___________________________^

I`m retired

Hiks...muda lagi dah nk retired....baru 19...oppss, 23 la....hahaha....i`ve made a decision, no more facebook or friendster.....hmmm....facebook tu ak partially retired....because i do need facebook to keep in touch with my friends.....friendster dah selamat ak delete account...hahaha...lama dah x masuk friendster....

Ak addicted to facebook sampai 1 hari ak tersedar, kalo ak terus fb-ing, i will not finish my masters...bila x abis masters, mcm mna nk wat PhD....huuuuu.......itu mmg impian  ak untuk buat PhD....xdpt jadi doktor medic xper la, dapat PhD pon Dr jugak...Dr komputer...hiks....

So, since ak xboleh nk displinkan diri ak, ak mntk my sis untuk tukar password....i will only login next year, but no specific time lagi...huhuhu...let me finish my literature review first....

Tapi, cuma 2 benda yg ak xboleh nk stop...1 is yahoo messenger and second is my  "lovely" forum, Drama Republic....hahahaha.....the forum did "changed" my life in some way...it`s not about the forum community (hmm, tipu la kan, somehow, some of them are now my "virtual" bestfriend, i can easily share my opinion with them, they are really a good friends....unfortunately, i cannot reveal their name here...so, to him, him, him, him and her (most of them are guy...hahahahaha), thanks for being such a WONDERFUL friends to me.....you guys brighten up my day.....you guys rock~!!!!!! 

the forum itself pon influence byk dlm life ak... (ayat melampau sgt kan...ahh, lantak ler..suka atie le ak nk ckp pe pon...heeee), at least ada gak org yg ak leh share minat....my close friends suma tau yg ak nie memang minat citer jepun, artis jepun...mak ak pon dah tau...dulu dia bising gak, lama2 dia pon paham...thanks mak for your understanding...sayang mak...*muaaahhh*...ok2, sambung.....hr2 ak masuk forum tu....ohayo is a must...hahaha....wpun xde org kat chatbox, ak ohayo gak.....hehehe.....ish2...nk citer pasal forum tu byk yg besh, tapi masih xleh nk reveal nama2 org yg berkenaan...hahaha...nnt kena marah....huuuu~....tapi papepon, forum tu mmg the best walaupun baru nak masuk setahun..hehe...tahun depan 1st annivesary drama republic....kejap je kan....To Drama Republic admin and all moderators, keep it up a great work because u guys are awesome~!!!! i will always support my DR....heeee~

it`s true, i can slowly stop fb-ing, but to stop DR-ing, it`s really hard....whatever ppl say about it, i just don`t care about them, diri ak, ak tau pe yang ak buat....hehehe....my sis pon dah tau, monitor lappy ak msti ada website biru...hahaha....dorg panggil web biru je since dorg tak tau nama website tu...apa2 jer la sis....hiks....so, you will always see me at DR...hahaha...kecuali la xde internet...that can`t be helped....

tu je kot nak share kali nie..hehehe.....mengumbirakan hati mlm ini sbb pagi tadi dapat berita sedih...huk3......xper la, my first attempt kan, xleh nk expect dorg akan terus nk accept..."Learn as u go"......i love this quote since it comes from my beloved sis and supervisor.....insyaALLAH  i will try harder for my masters..... ^___________________________^

Accepted or Rejected?

Have you ever been rejected? How did you feel? sad? depressed? heeheh...saje je wat sedih sket...hahaa...tp mmg sedih jugak bila direject...aiyayayaya....tp bukan kena reject cinta ekk....no love involves in this post...begini kisahnyer.................

Hari nie ak dpt result paper acceptance untuk ke APSITT (Asia-Pacific Symposium on Information and Telecommunication).....and the result is....THEY REJECTED MY PAPER~!!!!....untuk menyedapkan ati, ak tnya si *tut*, and kak zila....dorg pon xdpt jugak...huhuhu.....sbbnya we all pnya research not towards technical sangat....we`re dealing with human being, so lebih banyak social interaction rather than machine interaction....hik3....so, in other words, no algorithm, simulation or mathematical proof needed in our research...

OK,sambung balik...pas dapat email dari reviewer, honestly, ada terasa give up because of their comments and reviews....then, terus ak sms my sis (kak ayu)...so, after dia tgk review tu and dia cakap, normal in research world, ur paper being rejected sebab mybe reviewer tu technical people, so he/she did not understand how non-technical people works...hehhe....

then, petang2 sket tadi, my lovely supervisor sent me an email....and this is what she said in her email...

"Shakirah

Please take these reviews as something to improve your paper. Don`t be upset, it`s a normal situation in the research world. Write and work harder. "

TT_TT.....Thanks a million Dr...Thanks for your understanding and thanks for everything.....I will try my best in my research....huhuhu...InsyaALLAH....

And now i`m waiting comments from my second svisor walaupun ak tau dia xkan reply...haizz...dia tengah gumbira kat langkawi bersama her colleagues...hiks....grant writing (ak yg tulis, dia yg edit..miahahah...lecturer ku ohhh lecturer ku....hehehehehe....

Ok, now ak aim untuk next conference, ITSIM, this coming June and submission of full paper this January....Go go shakirah...you can do it...hhehe...(bagi semangat kat diri sendiri)....

Ok, itu je nak cita.....huhuhu..masih ada kesedihan di hati ini....my first "baby" kena reject....huhuhuhu~

welcome 2010~!

Last ak update blog ak nov 11…hr nie dec 8…almost sebulan x update…hhuhuhu….i am damn busy…busy apa ekk? Game-ing, fb-ing, write-ing and apa2 saja yg ada –ing belakangnyer….(kecuali date-ing)…hik3….

Kejap ja dah end of 2009…huhuh…that`s mean dah 6 bulan ak menjadi student…huhuh…apa progress ak so far? Not much, still working on my dissertation, working damn hard on my literature review…yang lain2 dah kira ok sbb ak dah siapkan (not fully siap la)  extended proposal…extended proposal did help me in some way….at least ak   xbuat benda yg salah or else I will wasting my time studying benda yg ak xpatut buat….that`s the most scariest thing…since ak dpt biasiswa gov, so I really hv to “fully utilize” it….3 semester for me to finish up my masters….InsyaALLAH,  I will do the best untuk habiskan within 3 semester….friend, please pray for me….. >_<

Apa lg nak update kat blog ak nie? Ahaaaa, lately ak byk dpt wedding invitation…tapi I am really sorry guys sebab tak boleh nak attend…ada yg perak, ada yg kat Klang..jauh ler…ak nie xde kenderaan sendiri, susah sket, so ak kirim salam jer la…huhu…lagipun nak pg sorg2 (takde bf xbesh la…hahahahahah)….so, to all my friends yang dah selamat menjadi isteri org, bakal menjadi isteri orang n ada yang bakal jadi ibu next year…. T_T, selamat menempuh alam rumah dan tangga…semoga menjadi isteri solehah dan semoga menjadi keluarga yang sakinah dan mawardah…aminnnn~..kalo korg tanya ak bila nk kawen? ak nk pnjam ayat suraya jap, "ak akan kawen, hujung tahun…tapi tahun bila tak tahu lagi"…so korg tunggu jer la…hik3….xder fixed date lagi nak kawen… (bf pon xde, kawen mendenyer…. =_=)

Apa lg nak update ( as requested by mira, sbb dia tnya ak awat x update blog ak)…hehe…maaf le cik mira, lately ak sibuk..hehehe…tp i`allah ak try utk update my blog nie selalu….

Since 2009 dah nak abis (sekejap nyer), ak terpikir apa azam tahun baru 2010 nie….hmmm…apa ekk, tak pikir secara serius lg…tp yg pasti ada 2 benda yg ak kna siapkan before march 2010….aiyayayayaya

• 1.       Siapkan full paper untuk hantar ke ITSIM 2010 (“ds” mmg….. kalo dah suruh hntar, kna hantar gak >_<)

• 2.       Siapkan chapter 2 (literature review)….biar solid chapter 2 sebab research ak dealing dgn banyak theory….sumenyer “ancient” theories…huhuhu…so I really need to come out with a SOLID chapter 2 so that people will not question why I use this and that theory….tapi seriously, ak pnya research dealing dgn byk motivation theories, I think more than 5 tapi ak kna choose wisely theory mana yang ak nak detailkan dlm chapter 2….huhuhu….chaiyok2 kirah~!!!!

What else? Hmmm….haaaa, ak igt nk amek Japanese class la semester baru nie….heheh…sakit ati bila tgk interview video (ikimono gakari) takde sub, dorg gelak ,ak pon gelak, tapi haram 1 apa pon ak xtau pe yg dorg gelakkan…miahahaha….so I really need this class….since ak x penah amek any foreign language masa undergrad, so ak kna start denga JAL100…aiyak, basic class jer…hhehe.....

Ok….nanti ak sambung lagi merepek kat blog ak nie..heheh….byk benda nk share, ak up dulu pic, then baru la besh nk citer…tgk blog xde pic mana besh…jaa~ ^_^v